Thank you letters

I was given whitening cream for a face too dark to be considered desirable.

Thank you Dark circles, Brown Spots and Freckles for showing me what embracing a collection of differences in one space feels like.

I was told I had a great smile except for that line above my lips that shows face whenever I smile big, if there was only a way to make that go away

Thank you Crease above my Lips, for animating my face when happiness is unbound.

I was told that I had such a pretty face except for my nose, specifically the bulb at the end. That I was lucky my bridge was small enough that a small fix would bring perfection to my face.

That you Lemon Drop, for teaching me what true love feels like.

I was told I have ‘man hands’

Thank you, you Fat Freaking Sausages, for reminding me of my father and his sacrifices to get to where we are today. Thank you for helping me express myself beyond words and through creation.

I was told I’m too sensitive and feel too much, that I should care less.

Thank you Sensitive Heart, for giving me the gift of Feel to be able to be there for people even when you know it will hurt. Thank you for being strong enough to keep me true to you when I forget myself.

I was told I’m angry and abrasive and confrontational at the first sight of speaking up for myself.

Thank you Tongue for listening to Body when things feel off and uncomfortable. Thank you Strong Spirit, for always being a voice that protects my Sensitive Heart when I neglect it.

I was told I overthink and consider too many things and that I need to just ‘be easy’ and ‘let it go’

Thank you Cerebro, for having the capacity to self reflect and ask the difficult questions even when the image is painful. Thank you for keeping your health and sticking around even when I thought you would leave.

I have learned to stand on my own, tall. Tall, past the echoes of words used to keep me down, controlled, ‘less than’. Thank you for putting out my fire so many times, thinking I was weak in love, it taught me how to rebuild it ablaze. Thank you for bringing me to a place of complete love and understanding for you, for how small you had to make me to meet your smallness.

Moving while growing up, I never had a consistent group of friends or a home base where everything I love resides. Because of this I have learned to stand tall past the echoes of every reason given to me as to what makes me so unacceptable. I have been able stand long enough to apply my own definition of my right to love through full acceptance, through my own eyes, with my own words. I have found through that unbound love, connections along the way that are rare but so true. Everything I love has been scattered around the earth. And now, I stand alone, in a new place in a new home. I live where airplanes pass through and there is a straight view of a runway. And I’ve never felt so connected alone watching take off and landings and knowing exactly who I am and where I need to be.